Don't lie

After being sick a day and coming in I find that my room has been organized. Usually I would be pissed about it but, I really needed it to be done. I had been trying for the last week to get it organized to no avail. This is nice. The kids seem better as of this morning but it could all change in a minute.

I catch you in a bold-face lie constantly. I now know how teachers feel with that that shit. I can clearly see someone do the same things over and over and lie about it. When I say keep your comments to yourself I mean it. Stop having outrageous outbursts and then stare at me like a deer in headlights.

One of the other things I don't understand is how a kid can constantly talk shit about another one in school but be best-friends on the playground or outside of school. There are 2 children I have that do this on a daily basis. I am getting sick of it. Today I called them out on it....again... and one of the children jaw's nearly hit the floor. "I didn't say that, no really." SLAM. Yes you did and your being an ass. People look at me like I am crazy when I tell them my class is a bunch of monsters and there are some really big jerks in the class.

One child in particular, let's call her Diva because shes the biggest one I know. Diva feels the world owes her something. Whatever it is, she demands it. I don't want to go on too long of a rant because I would rather have specifics instead of me just bitching.


(That picture was taken from the book named The Book of Sea Monsters.)

Killer children

I have had a killer headache and will not be going to school tomorrow. Today has been a struggle to say the least. Every loud word is a brick to the face. I have to yell constantly in this class. When you let them do something fun they take it and run with it. I want to do more things but I can't because their behavior is shit. I'd like to have a couple days in a row where they behave so well I don't feel like I am teaching. That would be nice.

Holy shit major edit: One kid just walked up to me and tried to ask about the test I am having the sub give: 

"We have to remember, to remember?"

"Wait what?"

"We have to remember to remember?"

"Remember what?"

"To help you remember"

"Sure...."

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......

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wtf?

I have had an amazing weekend driving north and visiting a friend. I saw this metal band that I had been following for awhile and happen to be good friends with. We were also able to go out Friday and Saturday night. Mission accomplished. All of this drifted away to my 7am alarm clock... As I trudged my way through putting clothes on and getting out the door I remembered I hadn't posted before I left Friday.

Friday was beyond hectic but something I realized. One of my kids is definitely drama club material. He gallivanted into school that morning with a giant smile, dropped his books, and said, "Don't I look FABULOUS!"

I laughed so hard I choked. He sat down after awhile but just kept talking about how awesome he looked.

Another tear, another day...

I’ve managed to make 2-4 kids cry today…awesome. They think I like making them cry. The truth is… I don’t. It sucks. One kid, sat behind his chair for probably 15min sulking. He made fun of another kid’s shoes for the 4th or 5th time today. I had, had enough and promptly asked him to shut his yap. Two girls earlier on in the day don’t want to do work so they begin balling. I walk up to the two of them and ask them to turn the water off because I don’t want to pay the bill. The same two girls cry all the time in the class … all the time. I GET SO FRUSTRATED. I have had to tell them,

“Those tears don’t work on me,” or my other favorite, “Seriously, no seriously, did I do this to you…no. Does it affect me? NO.”

After telling my bestfriend what happened today he texts me this:

“Every time a child cries an angel loses it’s self respect for all man kind. Good thing they don’t exist.”

At this point all I want to do is rave. I know it sounds ridiculous but I want to either be driving somewhere or raving. HARD.

The excursion.

I've managed to sneak into the heart of the lions den and become a "teacher." It's exotic and scary. My first few weeks have been spent trying to gain respect. Respect. Respect. Respect. What a joke.

Well since it's a Jesus School, The Father comes in once a week to teach more about religion. And since I just teach it out of the book, it's helpful to flood their tiny minds... So we are sitting there talking about the Mayan Calendar and how the worlds going to end in 2012. The Father looks me dead in the eye and says...

This immediately sends the classroom into an uproar. Needless to say I set up a lollercoaster and rode it for the next 5 minutes while he tried to calm the class down. "I have $65 already and you can't have it." "I need my money, it's mine," another kid yelled at the top of his voice.

After 20min of him being there I decided I was going to create this site. So I went on Facebook to get the general census of people aka to get attention and this is what turns up.